By Tim Gamble
Finding and building community is something that most preppers and survivalists agree is a good idea, but find it very difficult to do in reality. I certainly struggle with this issue, and I've heard from lots of others who struggle with it, too. Why is finding or building community so hard?
A large part of the reason it that we are looking at the issue in the wrong way, or at least in an incomplete way. We seem to focus on the external - who should be in the group, who should be excluded, where to find group members, how to talk to them about preparedness, how can they be best integrated into a group...
We largely ignore the other half of the equation, the internal. We ignore ourselves, and our own attitudes and problems. It is these internal issues that may be blocking our efforts to find or build community. It comes down to our inability or unwillingness to trust others.
Let's face it: many of us are very independent-minded: I want to do things my way and only my way. We cling to our own individuality. "Compromise" is seen as a dirty word. Delegation of duties and responsibilities is difficult (what if they don't do it "my way').
Most of us are not very trusting by nature, which is part of why we are preppers in the first place. After all, if we really were that trusting, we would trust the government and other authorities to take care of us in an emergency. Most of us are suspicious of others by our very nature.
A successful community requires we trust each other, but most of us are not wired to be trusting of others. Therefore, we end up looking for "perfect" group members; folks we can absolutely trust and feel extremely safe bringing into the community. Yet there are no perfect people, so we are doomed to look continuously without success.
Perfect is the Enemy of Good Enough
Understand that I am not advocating blindly trusting everyone and anyone. We do need to consider the character, trustworthiness, and compatibility of folks we let into our lives and community. But, if we are to be successful, at some point we have to be willing to say "This person isn't perfect, but they are good enough." Hopefully, they will be willing to say the same about us. After all, we are not perfect either.
Just something to think about.
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