Surviving Dystopia: Death, Wills, and Estate Planning

By Tim Gamble

(Become a Dystopian. Join the free email list!)

This is a deeply personal topic for me to discuss. My father passed away suddenly and unexpectedly in 2006. He was just 62 years old. He had no will. He had made no funeral arrangements. He left behind no final instructions. He had handled all the finances, and my mother knew nothing beyond the checkbook. His finances were a mess, and he left behind no master list of financial accounts, credit cards, retirement accounts, or other important information. He and my mother had never had a discussion of what to do in the event one of them died. 

We were left scrambling to find a burial plot, and make funeral arrangements. Mom had no idea if he had any life insurance (turns out he had a small policy through his employer) or retirement accounts. She didn't know all the loans or credit cards he had (a lot, it turned out), or even whether or not he had done the taxes yet for that year (no). All of his financial paperwork was literally stuffed in a desk drawer and two cardboard boxes, with no organization whatsoever. 

I don't know why Dad did no planning in the event of death. Maybe he thought he had plenty of time since he was just 62 and seemed in good health. Maybe the topic of death was just uncomfortable or even scary for him. Maybe he didn't want Mom to find out how deeply in debt they really were, and how unprepared for the future. Maybe he didn't want to face those facts himself. Whatever the reason, he left behind a huge mess for his wife and family to deal with, at a time when they were already grieving. Please don't do that to your family, whatever your excuses.

Wills - Individual states have rules regarding probate, taxes, and distribution that you and your family will have to follow. But within those basic rules, there is a lot you control. Actually not having a will enables the state to do whatever it wants with your estate. The fact is that going through the estate planning process, including creating a will, makes it a lot easier on your family and helps you to direct your assets according to your desires as much as possible. You can also take steps that will minimize estate taxes your family will have to pay. An estate attorney or a CPA can help you with this. By the way, in most states you don't have to have your will prepared by an attorney. You can do it yourself. There are do-it-yourself will and estate planning kits available (Amazon link) and they are valid in most cases. You will have to have it notarized, of course, and may need to make certain adjustments depending on your particular state. That information should be included with the kit, and is easily available online. 

For more on simple wills, see the Dave Ramsey article: What Is a Simple Will? 

In addition to a will, you need to do some other preparations for death, including life insurance, funeral arrangements, and what I call the creation of a Master List for your family after you pass away. 

Life Insurance -  From my previous article on insurance: "Life insurance is important at all stages of life. It can cover funeral costs, pay off medical bills that surviving family members may otherwise be stuck having to pay,  pay off debt owed by the estate, and provide living expenses for a surviving spouse and children. Even young, healthy people may die unexpectedly, which is not only devastating emotionally for surviving family members, but is potentially devastating financially, too.  Making sure you have adequate coverage for your personal circumstances is crucial. Be sure to review your coverage yearly, as your circumstances and needs change throughout life. 

Get started with this article on DaveRamsey.com: What Is Life Insurance and How Does It Work? It explains what life insurance is, and how it works. The article also goes into the different types of life insurance, who needs insurance, and how to decide how much insurance you need."

Funeral Arrangements - One of the difficulties we ran into when my father passed away was finding somewhere to bury him on short notice. We didn't have time to "shop around" to find the best location or the best deal. Same goes for finding a funeral home, a coffin, and arranging the other aspects of a funeral. It didn't help that my parents had never had a conversation about funeral arrangements, which caused Mom additional worry over what kind of funeral Dad would want. In the end, everything came together, but it wasn't easy or cheap. 

Funerals are expensive, potentially very expensive. There is no standard pricing. Prices for burial plots, coffins, and funeral home services vary widely. And these things all have to be done immediately upon death, during a time of high emotion and grieving. It would be much easier if this process could be done beforehand. The good news is that it can be. Pre-paid funeral plans are the way to go, in my opinion. Just make sure the plan you buy is transferable (some are, some aren't) in case the funeral home you buy it from goes out of business. We have done this with my mother. Her funeral, which hopefully she won't need for many years yet, is fully paid, and we know it is the funeral she wants because she helped design it. There will be no last minute scramble to figure it all out when she passes. 

For more, check out the Complete Guide to Pre-Paid Funerals: Plans, Costs, Pros & Cons (article on another website). 

Master Lists - Here is something that would have helped me if my parents had created them before Dad passed away: Master Lists of useful information for those left behind. 

The first master list I suggest is a list with updated contact information for all the people that will need to be contacted upon your death. In today's world, we all have friends, relatives, business associates, and various acquaintances scattered all over the place. Some we see on a regular basis. Others we haven't talked to in years. Mom had an address book with the contact info for most of our relatives, but there were several former business associates and a couple of Dad's old army buddies that we weren't able to contact before the funeral. 

The second master list I suggest, and I really needed this one in the months following 
Dad's death, was a list of all bank accounts, credit card accounts, retirement accounts, investment accounts, monthly bills, debts, and other financial information. Be sure to include account numbers, pin numbers, website login names and passwords, and so forth. I had NONE of this information, which caused much difficulty and wasted time. 

Keep these two master lists with your other important documents, including having a back-up copy or two stored separately.  

 Don’t wait—do it now! 

Now is the best time to create your financial emergency plan and to put it into action.  Its not easy. Its not fun. There is a lot to do. It may seem overwhelming. Just take a deep breath, and take baby steps every day. Eventually it will all come together. The peace of mind from knowing you and your family are prepared for any financial emergency will be worth it.

----------------------------------

Ad: Will and Estate Planning Kits (Amazon link).